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Where I'm from

If you asked me where I'm from five years ago, I'd say:

I'm from thick curly natural dark brown hair
I'm from beautiful maroon eyes
I'm from home cooked meals and snacks all day
I'm from XS shirts
I'm from "wow, you look like a skeleton"
5 years ago I'd say I'm from TV5 Monde and climbing trees and swinging slides.
I'm from getting scars all over my legs with all the running and climbing
I'd say I'm from running around everywhere
I'm from constant academic awards
I'm from sport awards
I'm from awesome art classes
I'm from taking my brothers clothes cuz they looked nice
I'm from amazing,fun karate classes
I'm from being outside all the time
I'm from spending long evenings with my friends doing whatever came to our minds.
I'm from best friends who always had each others back.
I'm from loads of friends
I'm from sleepovers
I'm from eating popcorn late at night with my friends because of the pouring rain
I'm from dressing up and pretending I'm a superstar.
I'm from pretending to be a gymnast
I'm from learning cartwheels in the corner of my room
I'm from climbing the bunk bed only by the window and never the stairs
I'm from saving up money for tea parties
I'm from tea parties spent with laughter and story telling as big as our little minds could imagine.
I'm from Friday pizza night on the balcony.
I'm from the new year barbecue that would take up hours of the night.
Five years ago I'd say I'm from happiness.

If you asked me where I'm from a year ago, I'd say:
I'm from curly dark brown hair falling out in chunks
I'm from maroon eyes that never seem to shine
I'm from size L jeans that suffocate me
I'm from "don't you think you should lose some weight, you're getting a belly"
I'm from "you're getting more and more stretch marks"
I'm from "you're eating too much"
I'm from " you have hip dips and you're only 13"
I'm from "those are the clothes I wore when I was 40 and you're 13"
I'm from hiding my arms because they look fat
I'm from hiding my hands because they're hairy
I'm from hating my eyebrows just because they connect.
I'm from hating my thighs because they're as big as my face
I'm from hating my legs filled with scars and thick hair
I'm from sitting in my room all day on my phone
I'm from getting irritated easily
I'm from not talking to my grandma who's done so much for me
I'm from walking fast from the bus to school so nobody sees my legs or my uniform
I'm from wearing a hoodie all day long so that my sweat stench doesn't go out
I'm from staying in the corner of the classroom because no one seems to want to be my friend
I'm from people asking me why my uniform is old
I'm from not eating lunch at school because its in a box and the others have it in plastic bags
I'm from hardly drinking water because i didn't have a plain plastic bottle like the others
I'm from having sleepless nights, eyes wide awake, staring at the cracks in the wall until I had them memorised.
I'm from crying my eyes out wishing ever so desperately everything was just a bad dream.
I'm from pulling my socks as high as they would go just to cover more of my legs.
I'm from feeling empty and hating everything
I'm from clawing my hands because I'm between people in a bus seat and I'm sweating so much that the seat becomes damp and my face turns red with embarrassment.
I'm from feeling everyone's eyes on me as I walk in school and from hearing what they say about ne in hushed tones.
A year ago I'd say I'm from a time I'd never wish even on my greatest enemy.
I'm from some of my friends forgetting me
I'm from feeling lost and alone
I'm from hurting my skin whenever I felt nervous
I'm from avoiding going out so I don't feel wierd
I'm from feeling out of place.
A year ago I'd say I'm from loneliness


If you asked me now where I'm from, I'd say:
I'm from healthy curly dark brown hair
I'm from maroon eyes that shine with a new hope
I'm from size L jeans that fit me
I'm from being happy the way I am
Im from not minding that I have a healthy body and having a little belly with it
I'm from being proud of the way I look
I'm from covering my arms because I wear hijab
I'm from learning to appreciate my eyebrows because they are unique.
I'm from liking my scars because they are a reminder of all the fun I had.
I'm from talking to my family
I'm from having patience
I'm from calling my grandma regularly because she's done so much for me
I'm from walking normally to enjoy the beauty around me
I'm from being in a new school in a new country and making loads of fun friends
I'm from discussing outfits with my classmates and from playing rock, paper, scissors with the school opposite us.
I'm from eating with my friends in the cafeteria and always taking double dessert.
I'm from drinking so much water from my plain plastic  bottle
I'm from having good sleeps
I'm from praying to God whenever I feel like crying
I'm from learning more about my religion and appreciating it more.
I'm from pulling my socks because I'm a hijabi
I'm from feeling empty but a little happy empty.
I'm from appreciating all the beauty around me
I'm from enjoying the bus ride vibing to all the songs that come up.
I'm from feeling like I fit in with a whole school of people kind of like me.
I'm from slowly reconnecting with my friends from India
I'm from hurting something else when I feel like hurting my skin
I'm from trying to meditate and maintain "inner peace"
If you asked me where I'm from now, I'd say
I'm from a better place
I'm from an improved version of myself
I'm from feeling peaceful
I'm from being less nervous in public
I'm from trying to make friends
I'm from a smile everywhere I go
I'm from a light heart
I'm from doing things I like
I'm from eating
Now, I'm from being better♡

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